Of Shorties and Armor
by XxI-Stole-Your-CookiexX
Summary: "Toto, I've got a feeling we're not in Kansas anymore.." "Ashley, my name is Jenna, and we've never lived in Kansas. Ever." "I know, I've just always wanted to say that." When two best friends find themselves in the world of Fullmetal Alchemist, adventure, hilarity, danger, romance, and way too much nonsense ensue. Ed/OC Al/OC R&R!
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter 1**

**xXxXx**

"Die! DIE I SAID, DAMMIT!"

"Ashley, screaming at the TV will not kill it any faster."

"You know, you could show a little support.. Aaugh, NAVI GO AWAY. I DON'T NEED YOUR HELP."

Next to me, my best friend laughed and rolled her eyes. Even though my eyes were glued to the TV screen, I just knew she rolled her eyes. Cause that's just what Jenna does.

It was almost midnight, and we were doing our weekly ritual; Zelda, pop, weird movies, and Fullmetal Alchemist, and I was currently kicking some butt at Ocarina of Time.

"This stupid thing just won't die... GOD I HATE THE WATER TEMPLE."

Jenna placed a hand on my shoulder, laughing. "Calm down. Look, just one more hit and it'll probably die!"

And sure enough, one more hit and the stupid thing finally fell in defeat and the music slowly began to play.

Jenna was about to congratulate me, but I stuck out my hand to stop her. "We must never trust the music to tell us if a monster is actually dead. Remember?"

Jenna thought about it for a minute, then nodded, remembering the time we played Twilight Princess. The damn boss of Arbiter's Grounds definitely fooled us.

The monster on the screen exploded though, so I knew it was actually dead. Standing up and cheering, I threw down the controller and began dancing around the room. My happy dance was cut short though by a pillow smacking me in the face. I looked over at Jenna, who sat on the couch smiling up at me.

"What was that for?" I asked, plopping down next to her. She just shrugged and grabbed the Wii Remote, or as I liked to call it, the Wiimote, and turned it on. I cringed at how loud the TV suddenly got.

"Geez, even though I'm half deaf, that will always be too loud..." I grumbled.

"Cheer up Ashley, it's Fullmetal Alchemist time!" Jenna cheered, throwing up her hands. I joined her, and together our hands danced in the air. Even though we were only five episodes in to the anime, we had both fallen in love with it.

I leaned back on the arm of the couch and took a long gulp of my Dr. Pepper. "What if we could perform alchemy?" I asked, my eyes widening. Jenna just shrugged.

"Well I mean, it's not like alchemy isn't real. Or wasn't, I guess. It was like a thing in the middle ages, like a combination of philosophy and science. People thought they could change the chemical composition of things to make what they wanted. Like turning lesser elements in to gold, that was the main dream. Except for the Philosopher's Stone. Every alchemist wanted to make one; they even called it the Magnum Opus (great work). They thought it could turn any element in to gold, and any lesser stone in to gems. They also thought it could produce the Elixer of Life, granting them immortality. As far as we know, no one succeeded in any of that. But I mean, I guess it's not impossible. We've learned that you can make gold, even if it does cost like a bajillion dollars and whatnot. But that's science, not alchemy."

She finally finished, looking up at me like it was the simplest thing in the world. I blinked a few times and then shook my head slowly.

"Must you always make me look dumb?"

She shrugged, smiling at me. "It's kinda my thing."

"Well, since you're so smart, why don't you try it?" I asked, raising my eyebrows.

"Because, paper is all the way upstairs, and I don't feel like going up to get any."

I crossed my arms. "Just clap your hands. Be like Ed."

Jenna thought about it for a minute and then shrugged. "Why not?"

She stood up, then yanked me to my feet as well. She looked around the basement for a few seconds, then ran over to a table. Picking up a rock, she showed it to me.

"I'll try and change this into a perfect square. Small and simple."

I nodded, and leaned against the wall, watching intently. Then I began to laugh, thinking of how nerdy we were for even trying this when we both knew it wasn't going to work.

Jenna set the rock down, and took a deep breath. Giving me a final look, she turned to the rock and clapped her hands, and then placed them on the rock. And what happened next totally threw me off guard.

_Oh my God, oh my God, oh my God. It actually worked! Holy poop!_

Jenna slowly turned to me, back to the rock, and then back to me. We stared at each other for a minute, in complete silence.

"Ashley…"

"What. Just. Happened."

Jenna slowly shook her head, placing her hands on each cheek. "I-I have no idea… How is... Ashley, I'm pretty sure I just defied every rule in the book right now."

I laughed dryly, still in shock. "I have no idea. But I'm pretty sure this makes you an alchemist."

Jenna thought about that for a minute, and then finally broke out of her trance. She jumped up and down, squealing. She grabbed my shoulders and pulled me with her as she danced. "I'm an alchemist, I'm an alchemist!" She chanted.

I laughed with her, dancing around. Suddenly I stopped, and smiled. "Now it's my turn."

I slowly walked over to the rock with crossed fingers. I looked at Jenna, who nodded in encouragement. Turning back to the rock, I repeated exactly what my best friend had done a few minutes earlier.

Aaaannndddd, nothing.

"What? But how come you can do it, but I can't?" I asked, rather angry. Jenna just shrugged, looking at me sadly.

"It's a wonder I can even do it... It's okay Ash. It's not all that cool anyways."

I gave her a you're-kidding-me-right? look. She just looked at the ground. I sighed and plopped back down on the couch. "Why are you able to do this? And I'm not just saying that because I'm mad I can't, I'm saying it because it shouldn't be possible!"

Jenna thought about it for a second, then shook her head. "I honestly don't know. I mean, like I said, people have tried it before, but nobody's ever succeeded. Why me?"

I ran a hand through my long, messy hair. "I don't know… But I do know that we can't tell anyone about this, okay? If people found out, either you would go to the loony bin, or to laboratories to be worked on. Let's just keep this between us."

My friend nodded in agreement. She said something else, but I couldn't hear her because a familiar loud beeping filled both my ears. I groaned, and Jenna gave me a weird look.

"It's always while I'm at your house! Always! They _always_ die!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up. Jenna laughed.

"Your hearing aids again?"

I nodded. Standing up, I walked to the door. "I'll be right back. Gonna go get the spare batteries I keep in your house!"

I ran up the steps, and appeared in the kitchen. Walking over to the cabinet where they kept their batteries, flashlights, tape etc., I opened it. Or tried. Sighing, I walked into the dining room and grabbed a chair from the table. I pushed it over to the cabinet and stood on it.

_Curse my 5 foot figure. I can never do anything around here._

Grabbing the pack of hearing aid batteries, I grabbed two and hopped off the chair. Taking out both of my hearing aids, I quickly took out the dead batteries of each of my hearing aids, and replaced them with fresh, new ones.

I was just about to head back downstairs when a loud crash came from the living room, freezing me in my spot. I knew me and Jenna were home alone, and Jenna was downstairs…

I turned slowly back towards the living room and crept my way over. The living room was empty, and there was a lamp laying on the ground shattered.

I was about to freak out until I remembered that my friend had a kitten that just loved to get into things. I laughed at myself for being so paranoid, and got down on my knees.

"Meeko!" I called, looking around for the little kitten. "Where are you, ya little demon?"

I crawled around for a little bit, then decided to look under the couch.

"Meeko!"

"Well hello there."

I screamed loudly, surprised at the other voice, and turned around. Standing in the doorway was a teenage… thing? To be quite honest, I could tell if it was a boy or a girl. It looked something around my age, if not older. It was wearing a black shirt that looked more like a sports bra in my opinion, and a skirt with shorts on under it. It had long hair, and wore a headband around its head. That was either one really girly boy, or one really flatchested girl.

"W-who are you? And why are you here?" I asked, scooting up against the couch. I looked around for something I could maybe use as a weapon, but there was nothing. A few seconds later, Jenna burst into the living room, a baseball bat in hand. She stopped though when she saw It.

She looked at me, then back at It. "Hello sir and/or ma'am, what are you doing in my living room?"

I guess It didn't find that very funny, because its smirk dropped and a scowl replaced it. "I am here because one of you doesn't belong," it sneered. Even its voice was high pitched.

Jenna walked slowly over to me and whispered in my ear. "Who is this person, is it a boy or a girl, and why does it look kinda like a palm tree?"

A simple shrug answered all those questions.

"W-what do you mean one of us doesn't belong?" I asked, feeling a tad bit braver. He didn't seem to be armed with a weapon, so I didn't feel too threatened.

"Yeah, from the looks of it, _you're _the one that doesn't belong," Jenna said.

"What I mean is, one of you two is an alchemist," It said, the smirk slowly returning. Jenna and I froze at that, and I looked at her from the corner of my eye.

"Well, you must have the wrong house. We're definitely just two normal human beings. No alchemist here!" I laughed nervously.

It just rolled its eyes. "I am not stupid. Just tell me which one of you is the alchemist. It would make things a lot easier for all of us."

"We already told you! Neither one of us is an alchemist!" Jenna said, gripping the baseball bat tighter.

It shook its head, the smirk getting bigger. "Alright then. Guess you want to do this the fun way."

Without warning, it sprinted towards us, and I soon found myself on the ground. Peeking through one closed eye, I say the thing on top of me, smiling deviously down at me. I saw Jenna over its shoulder, freaking out.

Suddenly, I felt something cool against my throat. Looking down, my heart skipped a beat when I saw a large knife pressed up against me.

"Tell me which one of you is the alchemist, and I won't harm a single hair on her head," it told Jenna. Closing my eyes, I felt tears gather up. I really didn't feel like dying today.

There was silence as Jenna thought about what to do. We had no idea who this man was, or what he would do to Jenna when he found out she was the alchemist.

I opened my eyes to look at Jenna, and she was pacing back and forth, chewing on her lip. The thing obviously didn't like how long she was taking, as I felt the blade press harder against my throat. I managed to squeal, and that seemed to snap Jenna out of it.

I expected her to answer, but she never did. Instead, she took of sprinting into her room and slammed the door shut.

"Stupid girl..," It growled. Looking down at me, he smirked. "You'll have your friend to thank for your death."

And with that, he pushed it even tighter against my throat, and I had to hold myself back from sobbing, or moving. Just as It was about to just thrust it into my neck, I heard a grunt and something whizzed through the air. It stopped pushing on the knife, and looked at its shoulder. I followed its gaze and was shocked to see a knife lodged into its shoulder.

It stood up, still looking at his shoulder. Then, he began to laugh. Softly at first, then it got louder as he looked up at Jenna.

"Foolish girl! I am Envy, one of the many Homunculi. You're going to have to do better than a petty little knife if you wish to kill me."

Homunculi? Da hell is a Homunculi? And Envy? What kind of name was that?

_Okay, I'm just gonna go out on a limb here and say he's a boy._

Envy shook his head, softly 'tsk'ing. "You will regret not telling me. But don't you worry. I will find out sooner or later."

Envy gave us one last chilling look and began to walk through the door. I stood up and rubbed my neck where the knife had been just minutes ago.

Just as I thought we were safe, Envy spun around, and the next thing I knew there was a very sharp pain in my stomach that grew with every breath I took. Looking down, I saw his knife lodged into my stomach.

I dropped to my knees, making weird grunting noises. I heard Jenna run over to me, and she was saying something, but I couldn't make out what. I looked up at Envy, who just gave me one last evil smile, and then he vanished. But just as he was disappearing, I saw a small flash of something red, and my eyes followed as the small thing hit the floor and rolled towards us. I pointed weakly at the thing for some reason. Even though I was dying, I felt like Jenna needed to see whatever that was.

Jenna followed my finger, and saw the small circular thing. Her hand not leaving my arm, she reached with her other hand to touch the rock. There was a loud piercing scream, and then darkness.

**xXxXx**

**(Third Person POV)**

Ed sighed as he and Al walked up to the gate leading into the headquarters, where the Colonel would be waiting for them.

"What's wrong brother?" Al asked, placing a hand on Ed's shoulder.

"What do you think is the matter? Once again I'll have to listen to Colonel Sarcasm. Tell me how I screwed up! 'Struck out on the Philosopher's Stone again, huh? How am I supposed to keep funding this goose-chase? Money doesn't grow on trees there, chief. Ed? Where'd you run off to? Oh wait, there you are! I couldn't see you there behind my paperwork, seeing as how you're so short and all.'.. I know. We're already here so I might as well get the verbal abuse over with. Let's go."

Ed waited for his brother's response, but it never came. The short blonde looked around confused. "Al? Hey Al? Al!"

Meanwhile, the giant suit of armor was off running towards the noise he heard. It had been small, but unmistakable. It was the soft meow of a kitten.

Al loved kittens, ever since he was a small boy. His mother never let him or Ed keep one though, but that never stopped him from loving them!

"Kitty? Kitty where are you? I know you're around here!" Al called out, trying to walk as quietly as his large body would allow. Hearing another meow, Al whipped his head in the direction of the noise. He had to stop himself from squealing out in joy as he saw the most adorable little orange kitten sitting on the cold, hard ground.

Al walked slowly over to the kitten, and reached out his metal arms. He swiped his arms, expecting to scoop up the kitty, but instead he scooped up air. Looking up, confused, he saw the orange kitten scurrying down a dark alley.

"KITTY COME BACK! I JUST WANT TO BE YOUR FRIEND!" Al cried, running after the cat. Making a sharp turn and nearly running into the wall, he saw the kitten sitting atop something. He couldn't make out what the cat was sitting on, but he didn't really think it mattered. Walking up to the cat, he managed to successfully pick it up and snuggle his face into the wet fur.

"Alright kitty, let's get you out of the rain." But just as he was about to turn, the cat meowed loudly and jumped out of his arms. If Al could move his mouth, he would definitely be pouting.

"Come on little one, I don't want you out in the rain!" Al bent down to go pick up the cat, giving him a closer look of what it was sitting on. "Is that..?" he asked himself.

Bending down with the cat still in one arm, he used his free hand to gently roll over whatever was laying on the ground. Al gasped as he was met with the face of a teenage girl. Looking closer, he saw that there was another one next to her. That one was bleeding pretty badly, and what looked like a knife was protruding from her clothing. Leaning down closely, he placed a hand on her chest and was relieved to see that she was still breathing. He stood up and quickly placed the cat in suit of armor, to shelter it from the rain and worse; Ed.

He took off running in the direction he came, and nearly ran over a short blonde in the process.

"Al! Where have you been?" Ed asked, raising his eyebrows. Al just shook his head and grabbed his brother's arm. He pulled him all the way back to the alley where he found the two girls.

"Brother, look! They're both still alive, but one has been hurt badly, and I'm afraid she doesn't have much time left! We have to do something!" Al explained, pointing at the two girls. Ed kneeled down next to them, and examined the wounded one. The knife was in there pretty deep and Al was right; she didn't have much time left.

He gently picked up the girl, carful to not hit the knife and make the wound worse, and looked at Al. "You get the other one. We need to get these girls to a hospital. Mustang can wait."

Al nodded and did as he was told. Luckily, the hospital was close by, so they managed to get there fairly quickly. They gave the two girls up to the doctor, and Ed called Mustang, explaining the situation. While Ed was away, Al snuck off to the cafeteria a few hallways away from the waiting room, and bought some food. He smiled to himself as he pulled out the kitten – who meowed cutely at him- and fed him the food.

"Alright Al, Mustang said tha- Is that a kitten?" Ed asked, stopping mid-walk. Al froze and turned his head slowly towards Ed. He quickly hid the cat behind his back and cocked his head innocently.

"What? Kitten? Psh, no. There's no kitten here. What makes you think there's a kitten here?" Al said, much to fast, making him seem even guiltier. A loud meow came from behind Al. Ed crossed his arms and raised his eyebrows. Al laughed nervously.

"Just working on my cat impression! Meow! See brother? I'm getting good, aren't I?" But just as Al finished talking, he felt the cat wiggle out of his grasp and jump down. The orange kitten made his appearance, and strutted over to Ed.

"Go put it back where you found it Al." Ed said, flinching away from the cat when he rubbed himself up against Ed's leg. Al picked up the cat and held it to himself defensively.

"He called to me! He was wet and hungry. He was the reason I found those girls! Can't we keep him?" Al asked, squeezing the kitten even tighter.

"No!"

"Jerk! I hate you brother! You're not even human!"

Ed sighed as his brother ran down the hallway still clutching the kitten. "Come on Al, don't run! Think of the kitten!"

"I know! I am! I'm the only one who is!"

Ed sighed and sank back into a chair, pinching the bridge of his nose. He would chase after his brother later, it was just too much work.

**xXxXx**

**(Ashley's POV)**

I woke up to a loud beeping noise, and somebody singing rather horribly. I sat up in my bed and winced as a sharp pain stabbed my stomach. I looked down, and saw that the knife was gone, but I could tell that the wound was nowhere near being healed.

Looking around I saw that I was in a medium sized room that was decorated blandly. There was a lady standing by a table, humming to herself as she did who knows what. Next to my bed was another bed, and in it was Jenna. She was already awake and she was smiling at me. Creepy..

"Finally! I've been awake for about 2 hours now, and there is absolutely nothing to do. Not even TV!" She said, like it was the most horrible thing in the world. I laughed and rolled my eyes. The lady at the table turned around, and I saw that she was dressed in a nurses outfit. She smiled kindly at me.

"Well hello! Glad to see you're finally awake. I'm nurse Lydia, but you can just call me Lydia. Can I get you anything?"

I shook my head. "No thank you." I smiled at her, and she smiled back.

"Alright, well I'll go inform the doctor that you're both awake, and I'll send in the boys that are outside waiting. I'll be back soon, if you need anything don't be afraid to give me a holler!" and with that, she left the room , closing the door softly behind her.

I looked at Jenna. "Boys?"

She just shrugged, a smile on her face. "Let's not question it, little one. Just enjoy it."

I crossed my arms. "I'm not _that_ little.." I huffed. Jenna laughed.

"Yeah.. you are."

"Am not!"

"Are too!"

"AM NOT!"

"Yes Ashley, you are small."

"Well.. Well, you're dumb!"

"Tell that to my above 4.0 GPA."

"I would hit you right now if I could move."

"Oh really?"

"Yes. Remind me later."

"To dumb to remember it yourself?"

"YOU KNOW WHAT JENNA?"

"WHAT ASHLEY?"

"YOU CAN KISS MY-"

I heard a loud cough, and we both stopped arguing. Looking over at the door, my jaw dropped. And by the gasp that escaped Jenna's mouth, I was willing to bet that she was just a shocked. Standing in the doorway was…

A caterer, with TONS and TONS of food!

I know I said I didn't want any food before, but the rumbling in my tummy made me think again. He pushed in the cart and stopped it when it was in between mine and Jenna's beds. He bowed and left the room without a word.

"Well that was weird.." Jenna said thoughtfully.

"Don't question the lovely gift of food!" I exclaimed, already piling tons of food onto a plate. "Oh my gosh, this stuff tastes like Jesus."

Jenna looked at me and raised her eyebrow. "You know what Jesus tastes like?"

I shrugged. "Ya know, it was a one night thing.. We both had a bit too much to drink.."

"ASHLEY! That's horrible!" Jenna said, throwing a cookie at me. But I could tell by her laughter that she found it amusing.

After a few minutes of stuffing our face, there was a knock at the door.

"Ka um ofn en!" I said, my mouth filled with food. Jenna gave me a disgusted look, then turned to the door to greet our visitors. I heard the door open, but I didn't look up from my food. It tasted too good.

"Oh.. Oh my god.." I heard Jenna whisper.

"Hey!" I heard an unfamiliar voice say. I looked up from my plate, and I swear I about had a heart attack right there.

Standing in the doorway was Edward and Alphonse Elric.

They were both smiling at us (well I assumed Al would be smiling if he could), and I'm pretty sure we were just giving them dumb looks back. Jenna and I looked at each other, then back at them. Edward stepped up, smiling.

"Hi, I'm Edward Elric, and this is my brother, Alphonse."

At the mention of his name, Al walked up next to his brother and waved. "Pleased to meet you! And I'm glad to see that you two are okay. It was a close call, especially with you!" he pointed at me. I just laughed nervously and nodded, not able to speak.

There was an awkward silence, and Ed finally spoke up. "So, are you guys going to introduce yourselves? Or are we going to have to take a wild guess?"

"Oh! Sorry! I'm Jenna, and that's Ashley. Did you guys bring us here?" Jenna asked. Al nodded.

"I found you two in an alley a few streets back. You were both knocked out, and Ashley, you were bleeding pretty badly. I'm glad we found you guys when we did!"

"Me too," I laughed again, "Thank you guys! Really, you saved my life!"

Ed rubbed the back of his neck, but I could see the blush. "Nah, it was nothing really."

"Uh, could you guys give me and Ashley a minute? We need to talk about uh.. girl things." Jenna asked, smiling at them.

"Girl things? What kind of girl thi-" Al started, but was cut off by his brother yanking his arm.

"Come on Al, you don't wanna know. Trust me. We'll just be outside." He gave us one last smile and closed the door. Jenna turned to me.

"Is this real? Am I dreaming? AM I DEAD?" She asked, reaching over to shake my shoulder. There was pain in my stomach, and I winced. She pulled back quickly, muttering an apology.

"Well, if you're dead, then I'm right there with ya! But.. is it possible? To be in the world of Fullmetal Alchemist? Ed and Al sure seemed real.." I pondered. Jenna shrugged.

"I mean, I can do alchemy.. It shouldn't be possible, but it is! We're here! They're out there! THIS IS SO COOL!" She exclaimed. I nodded, a huge smile on my face.

"But how did we get here?" I asked. That one seemed to stump Jenna, but then she perked back up.

"That red stone! When I touched it, it must have transported us here! I don't know how, but it did!" As she said that, she raised up her hands, and I noticed something. There was a strange tattoo on the back of her hand.

"Jenna.. your hand!" I pointed. Jenna looked down, confused. Her eyes then widened in surprise. She held out her hand and examined it.

"What does it mean?" I asked. She just shrugged, still shocked.

"That stone.. when I touched it, this must have happened!"

"Wow.. I wonder if it comes with special powers or anything!"

Jenna laughed, but I could tell it wasn't wholeheartedly. "I'm a freak."

"Yeah…" I nodded slowly. "But you're a cool freak!"

Jenna rolled her eyes and threw another cookie at me. I bit into it, and as I chewed a question popped into my head.

"Should we tell the boys that we're not from here?"

Jenna thought about it for a minute, then shook her head. "No. Not yet at least. Let's just see what we're going to do once we get out of here, and find out what episode we're in right now. For now, let's just tell them that we don't remember anything. Amnesia is always a good excuse."

I nodded, taking another bite into the cookie. "Sounds like a plan."

Well, this has certainly turned out to be an interesting day. And it was only going to get more interesting.

**XxXxX**

**Okay, so how was that for a first chapter? Good? Bad? LEAVE REVIEWS AND LEMME KNOW! Jenna and Ashley are based off me and my best friend Jenna, who goes by the name Blindj on here. Don't laugh at the name, she's blind as a bat without her glasses hahahaha but it's okay, cause I'm about as deaf as Helen Keller when I don't have my hearing aids in. And YES, I do actually have hearing aids. I decided that I was gonna make Ashley (me), be exactly like me. WOO! Okay, enough of my nonsense, review review review! What did I do good? What can I do better? What would you like to see in later chapters? LET ME KNOW! Love you all **


	2. Chapter 2

**XxXxX**

"So.. You can't remember anything? Nothing at all?" Ed asked, leaning back in his chair. I looked at Jenna and together we shook our heads. He placed a hand on his chin thoughtfully, and looked to his brother for help.

"Well, what can you remember?"

I had absolutely no idea how to respond to this, but Jenna was one step ahead, like always.

"We live far away. I remember that. And when I say far away, I mean _far _away. I.. I don't remember what the town was called though.." Jenna looked down for dramatic effect, and looking at the brothers' faces, I could tell that it was working.

"And there was a man named Envy.. He tried to kill us, and he almost killed me, as you can tell. That's the last thing I remember. Being stabbed. The next thing I know, I wake up in a hospital far away from where ever we were." I laughed awkwardly. Ed nodded slowly and then looked Jenna.

"Is there anything you can remember between Envy attacking you and being in the hospital?"

Jenna shook her head. Ed sighed and scratched his chin. Then he looked up, confused.

"Why was he trying to kill you two?"

I looked at Jenna, trying to ask her silently if we should tell them about her power. She just shrugged, and nodded slightly. "He wanted to know which one of us was the alchemist."

Ed's brow furrowed deeper, and he leaned on his knees. "But that makes no sense. Envy isn't one to just kill someone because they're an alchemist. There has to be something deeper here.. something that we don't know about."

I wondered for a moment if we should tell them about the mysterious red stone, but I decided that it was her call if she wanted to tell them or not. I would just keep my mouth shut and let her do the talking.

"We don't really know why he tried either. Out of all the alchemist in the world, why me?" Jenna asked, sighing.

"So you are the alchemist?" Al asked. Jenna nodded in reply. "Is Ashley one too?" Ed added. I shook my head.

"Nope. I'm just me. A plain Jane."

Al cocked his head in confusion. "But I thought you said your name was Ashley?"

I looked up surprised, and Jenna tried to hold back her laugh. I smiled at the innocent boy. "It was just an expression. My name isn't actually Jane."

Al seemed to think about this for a minute and then nodded, finally understanding. I laughed and shook my head slightly, when I felt a sharp pang in my stomach. But it wasn't pain from the wound.

"Uh, I need to go to the restroom.." I told Jenna quietly. She nodded, then looked around. I was confused as to what she was looking for, but I heard her say "Aha!" quietly, and she grabbed something. Turning around and grinning, she held out a bedpan.

"There ya go!"

I felt my face flush as I snatched the bedpan and placed it on the table. "Never in a million years would I ever use one of those. Here, help me out of bed." I held out my hand for my friend.

I heard a groan, and saw her rolling over so her face was buried in the pillow. "Nahh, I'm too lazy. You can manage."

Getting angry, I grabbed the bedpan from the table and was just about to smack her with it when a strong arm grabbed mine and stopped me from possibly giving my friend a concussion.

I looked up and began shouting, "Hey! Why'd you do th-" It took me a few seconds to fully register Ed's grinning face. Blushing, I dropped the bedpan and looked away.

"C'mon. Let's get you to the bathroom before you pee your pants. That would be bad." Ed said, wrapping his arm around my shoulders and slowly helping me up.

"Yeah, brother would know all about that!" Al exclaimed. Jenna and I burst into laughter, and Ed's face turned a bright red.

"It was one time Al! ONE TIME!" He then realized what he just admitted and blushed even deeper. "Forget I said that.."

"OH MY GOSH!" Al exclaimed again, sounding rather frightened. Ed let go of me quickly, almost knocking me down, and ran over to his little brother.

"What is it Al?" He asked frantically. Al was quiet for a moment, then said slowly, "There's.. There's someone in this world you're taller than brother! It's a miracle!" I frowned as I realized he was talking about me. Okay, so I was 5 foot! Ed was only 5'2 at the most, so he was pretty shrimpy too!

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SMALL HE COULD DROWN IN A RAINDROP?" Ed exploded, pointing a finger at his brother. Jenna and I looked at each other and burst out laughing.

"Someone's a little insecure.." Jenna mused, grinning at Ed, who got even angrier.

"You're insecure, don't know what for.. You're turning heads when you walk through the door," I sung to myself quietly, swaying slightly. Jenna looked over at me, and a huge grin spread across her face.

"Don't need makeup, to cover up. Being the way that you are is enough."

At this point, Ed and Al were staring at us, Ed looking very confused.

"Everyone else in the room can see it-"

"Everyone else but you!" Jenna pointed at Ed as she sang, making him blush.

"BABY YOU LIGHT UP MY WORLD LIKE NOBODY ELSE, THE WAY THAT YOU FLIP YOUR HAIR GETS ME OVERWHELMED!"

"THE WAY YOU SMILE AT THE GROUND, IT AIN'T HARD TO TELL!"

Jenna and I both danced our way over to the brothers, me ignoring the pain in my stomach, and continued to sing loudly and horribly. Jenna began to serenade Al, who stood there unmoving as my crazy friend danced around him singing.

"YOU DON'T KNOW, OH OH-"

"YOU DON'T KNOW YOU'RE BEAUTIFUL! OH OH-" I pointed at Ed, dancing awkwardly around him the best I could with my stupid stomach.

"THAT'S WHAT MAKES YOU BEAUTIFUL!" We sang the last part in unison, both striking odd poses. I opened my eyes slowly, and laughed at the sight before me. Al and Ed were both frozen to their spot, not saying a word. Ed had the stupidest look on his very red face. Al was the first to snap out of it.

"What just happened brother?" He asked slowly and quietly. It took Ed a minute to finally reply. "I-I don't know.."

Jenna and I grinned at each other, and high-fived. I suddenly remembered that I _really_ had to pee, and I jumped and grabbed Ed's shoulders and began shaking him roughly, scaring the poor guy.

"WHERE IS THE BATHROOM? I MUST GO! I HAVE TO TINKLE!"

"D-down the hall to your right!" He said, pointing down the hall. I gave him a quick hug.

"YOU JUST SAVED MY LIFE. AND MY BLADDER!" I shouted, and began walking as fast as I could down the hall.

Even from as far away as I was, I could hear Ed's voice. "That was really weird.."

**XxXxX**

I was cleared to leave the hospital a little while later, once I convinced the doctor I was okay. In all honesty, I wasn't totally okay, I just really disliked hospitals.

The city was huge, and it was so amazing. I then realized that I had no idea where we were, or what episode we were in. If was anything after episode 5, I had no idea what the hell was gonna happen.

"Uh, where are we exactly?" I asked Al, looking up at him. He was so _tall_! It wasn't fair.

"We're in East City."

I nodded, and looked at Jenna. She just shook her head, and that told me that she didn't recognize it either. We walked in silence for awhile, and that got really boring really fast. I needed some way to entertain myself.

"East City bitch, East East City bitch.." I sang softly to myself. Jenna smiled and sang along, and we kept singing that verse over and over again, mainly because we weren't creative enough to come up with a second line.

Al shook his head and Ed looked at us confused. "Do you guys do that often?"

I thought about it for a minute and then nodded. "Yup. Pretty much."

Ed groaned and I heard Al chuckle. Grinning, I just shrugged and kept on singing.

"Alright, we're here. Maybe you guys should stay out here.. Hey! Where are you guys going?" Ed asked, as he saw that we were already halfway up to the large building.

"Going in, duh! It's cold out here!" Jenna said, like it was the simplest thing in the world.

"But wait! You guys can't-"

"Don't even bother brother. It's too much work." Al said as he passed his brother. Ed just sighed and nodded.

Jenna and I eventually let Ed and Al take the lead, seeing as we had no idea where we were going. We walked down a long hallway and stopped in front of a door.

Before Ed could open the door, there was a loud meow, and it seemed to be coming from the large suit of armor next to me. I looked up, and I could practically see Al sweatdrop. Ed turned around slowly, looking angry.

"Al. I thought I told you to get rid of that damn cat!" He growled. If looks could kill a large suit of armor.. well, Al would be dead by now.

Al said nothing, and then suddenly took off running down the hall. Even after he disappeared, we could hear the loud crying noises and the thunks of his armor. Ed smacked his forehead, but it didn't look like he was about to chase after his brother. Jenna sighed and glared at Ed.

"I'll go see if he's okay," and with that, she took off running after him. Ed sighed, looked at me, and then pushed open the door.

The man sitting at the desk before us, surrounded by paperwork, was enough to make any girl swoon. He was the definition of tall, dark and handsome. Looking up at the sound of the door opened, I had to hold back my fangirlish squeal. A small smirk played at the edge of his lips when he saw Ed.

"Wow, Ed. You really have made some bang for our buck," Mustang said, standing up.

"Don't start that with me, okay? You're the one who told me to go to Liore for a Stone that turned out to be fake!" Ed pointed, raising his voice a bit. Mustang leaned on his desk and crossed his arms.

_Damn that man is sexy.. Whoa what am I saying? Am I crazy? .. No, I'm not. He's sexy._

"That's true," Mustang said, raising his eyebrows, "but I didn't ask you to unseat their favorite prophet."

"Yeah, and now a town ripe for uprising is under the rule of the military again," Ed thought about it for a minute, "Wait a minute! Is that what you were planning all along?"

Something flashed in Mustang's eyes, and for the slightest second he lost his composure. He then regained his smirk and changed the subject.

"You know I've heard an odd rumor about Xenotime, and its land baron, Mugear. Apparently he's missing, and his mansion collapsed."

"Yeah Xenotime, now where is that again? That's a city, right?" Ed asked. Again, Mustang didn't answer.

"Maybe I should have you file a report on the Red Water, too. I almost forgot. We had a little inquiry from a detective in Aquroya. So tell me. Is it true Psiren's a real ''ten'' under the mask?"

Ed rolled his eyes, clearing getting annoyed. "So you know everything I do, is that what you're trying to tell me? Great, I'm glad we had this talk."

The colonel sighed and stood up straight. "Settle down, Edward. You could at least look like you're following orders."

Ed stood up, getting angry now. "Why, so I can turn into another one of your toadies? We've got other objectives, you know."

Mustang laughed, but nobody cracked a joke. "Like the Philosopher's Stone? It's been three years, and you haven't gotten any closer."

Oh. Ouch.

Ed stood up, almost knocking down the chair from the force."I'm going to find it, no matter what!" He was breathing heavily. I placed a hand on his shoulder, and he seemed to calm down a bit.

"Colonel, tell me if the name Marcoh rings any bells for you. He's a doctor and alchemist who showed up in Xenotime with no background, five years ago. Apparently he cured the poisoning caused by the red water, which no one else could do, using some kind of alchemy. You always seem to know a little about everything, and the military's bound to have a file on someone that skilled."

Mustang seemed to be pondering it for a moment, then replied. "The name isn't familiar, no. But I'll check on it."

Ed nodded, satisfied with that answer. Mustang stared at Ed for a minute, then his eyes landed on me and he noticed me for the first time.

"Oh? And who is this pretty lady, Edward? You never mentioned you had a girlfriend! And she's actually shorter than you, that's amazing."

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE COULD RIDE ON THE BACK OF A BUMBLEEBEE?"

Mustang didn't seem to be paying the short blond much attention though. I couldn't help but blush and put my head down as looked me up and down.

"This is Ashley. She's one of the two girls I told you about. She was as good as dead when I found her, but she's okay now. And she is _not _my girlfriend," Ed explained. Mustang hummed in response, and smirked. He walked over to me and stuck out his hand.

"Colonel Roy Mustang. It's a pleasure to meet you Ashley, and I'm glad that you're okay. Where are you from?"

Crap. How did I answer that. Looking up at Ed, his eyes caught mine and I sent him a silent plead.

"She can't remember. Her and her friend said they're from far away, but they don't remember what the town is called. They also said that Envy was trying to kill them. Because her friend was an alchemist."

Mustang furrowed his brows. "But that makes no sense. There are plenty of alchemist in the world. Why her? Is there something special about your friend?" He asked me. I shook my head shyly.

He was about to say something else, but the door suddenly flew open. Jenna and Al stood in the doorway, Jenna looking flushed.

"Ed, you have one hard headed brother, and I don't mean that literally. Although his head is pretty hard.."

"Hey! I am not hard headed! I just didn't want to let the poor kitty go.. Where will he sleep? What will he eat?" Al said, shaking Jenna's shoulders.

"Calm down Al, I'm sure the kitten will be fine," Ed said, rolling his eyes. Al pointed at his brother.

"This is all your fault brother! If you just would have let me keep the cat-"

There was a cough, and the room silenced and all eyes landed on Mustang. Once he knew that he had our attention, he walked over to where Jenna stood. "My God, you guys were giving me a headache," he smirked at Jenna, "I don't believe I've met you yet. Colonel Roy Mustang. Are you this friend I've been hearing much about?"

Jenna nodded. "Yes, I'm Jenna. Nice to meet you. And what have they been telling you? Because you shouldn't trust anything Ashley tells you about me, it's probably all a lie!" She turned to me, and grabbed my shirt threateningly. "WHAT DID YOU TELL HIM?"

Ed grabbed Jenna and pulled her away from me. "Don't worry, she hasn't said anything."

Jenna seemed to except that, but she pointed her middle finger and index finger to her eyes, then pointed them at me, telling me that she was watching me. I had to hold back giggles as Mustang cleared his throat again.

"So, Ed here tells me you ladies can't remember anything. Not even where you come from. Is that correct?"

We shook our heads.

"So where do you plan on going?"

I looked at Jenna and she shrugged. "Well.. We haven't really thought about that."

Mustang nodded slowly, and placed a hand on his chin thoughtfully. "Alright. And are you the alchemist?" He asked, pointing at Jenna. She nodded curtly. Mustang was quite again for a minute, and then looked at Ed and Al.

"You two are responsible for these girls. She is an alchemist, so maybe she could help out. And I'm sure Ashley will come in handy as well."

Ed's face turned red, and his eyes widened. "But why do we have to babysit them? I'm sure they can manage themselves!"

Mustang shook his head. "I will not have two girls who cannot remember much running around East City. Who knows what could happen. No, they will travel with you and assist you on your 'quest'."

"But why can't they stay with someone else! Why do they have to come with us?"

Mustang sighed. "Because I said so. It's an order Elric. You are the Fullmetal Pipsqueak after all." A full fledged smile appeared on his face this time. Jenna and I had to keep from bursting out into laughter, and Al just sighed. He grabbed his shaking brother and held him back as he yelled insults at the Colonel.

The door flew open, and a pretty blonde woman marched into the room. "Company sir!"

Mustang looked confused, but then nodded. Then, a swarm of men and woman in blue uniforms like the blonde ladies' and Mustang's swarmed into the room. One man said something about the East HQ being temporarily used for Central Command. I couldn't tell you what was happening, I was still staring at Mustang. Jenna elbowed me in the side.

"You could at least make it a bit less obvious," she whispered. I turned a deep shade of red, and frowned.

"It's not _that_ obvious!"

"Ashley. You're drooling."

I blushed even deeper, and was thankful for when I saw everyone leaving the room, Ed and Al included. Jumping up, we began to make our way for the door.

"Well, thank you for everything Colonel." Jenna said, smiling. Mustang just nodded, standing there arms crossed. As we were leaving though, he called us back.

"Girls, do try to keep those boys out of trouble. They always manage to find a way make things hard for themselves.. It would be such a shame if something were to happen to either one of them.. That would mean lots of paperwork." He grinned, and I smiled at him. He winked at me, making me blush. I stood there just staring at him like an idiot until Jenna grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the room.

We met up with Ed and Al in the hallway, and we stood there for a minute, until a tall man with glasses walked up to us.

"Hello there boys!" the man asked, then noticed us. "Well hello! I don't believe we've ever met. I'm Maes Hughes. It's a pleasure to meet you!" He beamed as us.

Jenna and I smiled in return, and Jenna introduced us. "I'm Jenna and this is my friend Ashley. It's nice to me-"

Before she could say much more, he reached into his pocket and pulled something out, shoving it in our faces. "Look, this is my daughter Elicia! Can you believe how big she's gotten? She can even ride a tricycle now! She follows me everywhere on that thing, like my own escort of cuteness!"

Ed sighed and pushed Hughes' arm down so it wasn't in our face. "Yep. You're the same as ever Major; nice and insane."

We began to walk, and a few minutes later we found ourselves seated in a cafeteria like room, surrounded by other soldiers.

He seemed to be completely unfazed by this, and reached back into his pocket. "I've got more pictures. Wanna see?" He asked excitedly.

"Sure!" Jenna and I said together. Ed gave us a look and held up his hand.

"Maybe later, okay? Anyway, if you knew this transfer was gonna happen, you could have warned Mustang."

Hughes shook his head, a smile on his face. "Not a chance! I had to see the look on Roy's face. Oh, by the way... I'm a Lieutenant Colonel now. Got me in charge of Court Marshal investigations."

Ed rolled his eyes. "Sounds fun-filled beyond belief. Shouldn't you be in Central, then?" He asked. Hughes scoffed.

"Why, so I can work in a bunch of empty offices? All the major big-wigs are fleeing Central fast as they-" he realized that he said something that he probably shouldn't have. Frantically, he changed the subject. "Never mind! Uh... how's that search been going for the, uh-" he leaned in real close, "- You-know-what Stone?"

At that, me and Jenna, who had previously been playing Thumb War, listened a bit closer.

"Well, we're closer, or I'd like to think we are. Right now I'm looking for a guy named Marcoh who might have answers for me. But I can't get Mustang to tell me what he's got on him."

Hughes looked at him, raising his eyebrow. "Well, have you considered he might not have anything?"

Ed furrowed his brows and shook his head. "No, Roy Mustang's hiding stuff from me. I can definitely tell."

"Did I hear you say the name Marcoh, Fullmetal?" A random voice came, from out of nowhere. I looked around frantically, then up at the ceiling.

"Jesus?" I asked. From the corner of my eye, I could see Ed grinning and trying to hold back his laughter. A tall man with a nice mustache came into view.

"Brigadier General Grand," Hughes said, nodding at the man. Ed glared through squinted eyes.

"The Iron Blood Alchemist. What do you want?"

"I know I want to pet his mustache," I leaned over and whispered to Al and Jenna. The two stifled their laughter, resulting in odd looks from Ed and Hughes.

"What do you want with Marcoh?" Grand asked. "He's a filthy deserter. Six years ago, a brigade of State Alchemists were called on to neutralize the Eastern Rebellion. And Marcoh was in their ranks. But he went AWOL before the battle was done. The coward's been missing ever since."

A few minutes later we were back yet again, in Mustang's office.

"A deserter? Don't know him sorry." Mustang said. Ed groaned and dragged us out of the room. Somehow we ended up in the library, and Ed was furiously searching through books and papers.

"Doctor Marcoh? Nope. Doctor Marcoh? Not here. Damn it! Wouldn't you know it, he's been erased from all the record books! Clearly Mustang knows, but he's not talking. I'll have to beat it out of him!" He exclaimed. Al gasped.

"A fight? You couldn't get away with that!" he said, flailing his arms around. There was a soft bang from inside his armor, and a meow could be heard. Ed glared at his brother.

"Your stomach purring?" he asked, raising his eyebrows. Al sweatdroped.

"Yes! I mean no! I mean... you know, it's still raining outside!" the boy exclaimed. I laughed and looked at Jenna.

"Well I agree with him! It's raining out, the poor kitty shouldn't be out in the rain! Once it stops, we'll let him go. Right Al?"

Al nodded in agreement. Ed sighed and threw his hands up. "Whatever!"

There were footsteps, and we all looked over to see Hughes smiling at us.

"Ed, I forgot to mention something earlier, what with the pictures-"

"Get to the point," Ed growled.

Hughes' smile dropped and he jumped back, shocked. "Fine. I will. Rude little... As I was saying, due to conditions, your Assessments will be held here, Ed."

Ed looked confused. "Assessments?"

"You mean, to renew his State Alchemy certification?" Jenna asked. I was shocked at how fast she was catching on to things around here. I was still in the dark.

Hughes nodded. "I'll tell you later about all your options."

Ed jumped up, and I could pretty much see the lightbulb above his head. "I've got it, Major!"

"Lieutenant Colonel!" he retorted. Ed didn't seem to be listening though.

"No, seriously! I know the perfect way to show off my skills!" Hughes looked down confused. Ed looked over at us, a devious smile on his face. "Right?"

I shook my head and facepalmed. "Oh no.."

**XxXxX**

Later that night, we were all sitting in a small hotel room. Ed had fought Roy earlier that day, and though he didn't want to admit it, I could tell something happened. Ed seemed to be deep in thought ever since.

I lay sprawled out on the couch, and Jenna was sitting on the floor playing cards with Al. Ed was locked up in the bedroom that the four of us would have to share.

"Do you have any fours?" I heard Jenna ask. Al sighed, and I guessed he had one.

"Wait.. I asked you a few minutes ago and you said you didn't have any!"

"Uhh.."

"YOU LIED!"

"N-no I didn't!"

"Yes you did! You lied! Give me back my four!"

"NEVER!"

I chuckled as the two fought for the card. Standing up, I headed to the bedroom door. Just before I could open it though, I heard the sound of something ripping and two groans.

"See what you did Al? You just ripped the card in half!"

"Me? That was definitely you Jenna!"

"Well now neither of us can have the card!"

I smiled and turned the doorknob. Walking into the dark room, I saw Ed laying on one of the beds, with his hands resting on his chest. I closed the door, drowning out the sound of the bickering two in the other room. He gave me a small smile as I sat down on the end of the bed, crossing my legs.

"Hey," he said quietly.

"Hey."

He sat up so he was sitting cross legged like me. "What's up?"

I shrugged. "Nothing really. I just wanted to thank you for everything you've done for us today. It really means a lot. And the fact that you saved my life helps too," I laughed. He laughed, but I could see the faint blush creeping up his cheeks.

"You have Al to thank for that one though. He's the one that found you guys. I just carried you to the hospital."

I shrugged, still smiling. "It counts."

He laughed slightly, staying quietly. After a few moments of silence, I spoke up again.

"I'm sorry that we're such a burden though."

Ed looked up, confused. "What makes you think you're a burden?"

"Earlier today, when Mustang told you that you two would have to 'babysit' me and Jenna. You didn't seem to thrilled."

Ed nodded slowly. "Ah. Yeah, about that," he rubbed the back of his neck, "I'm sorry. It came out completely wrong, and made me sound like I didn't want you two to come along. It's not that I don't, it's just that it's too dangerous and.."

"And you don't want to be responsible for anything that happens to us. I get it." I gave him a small smile. "Don't worry, as soon as we can, I'll try and see if we can find a place to stay or something, so we don't slow you two down."

Ed's head snapped up again. "No! I mean, no. You don't have to do that. Really. I know I said that I didn't want you guys to tag along earlier, but now that I thought about.. I think it could be fun to have two more people with us."

I smiled at him. "Really?"

He nodded. "Don't get me wrong, I love my brother, but sometimes I just wanna strangle him. Even though I know I couldn't possibly do that."

I laughed, nodding. "Al's so adorable though!"

Ed's smile dropped, and he crossed his arms. "He is not!" he snapped back.

I raised my eyebrows. "Whoa there, I'm sensing someone's a little jealous!" I sung the last word, to tease him further. Ed's cheeks turned red and he shook his head.

"I am not!"

"I think you are."

"AM NOT!"

I stood up and laughed, smiling. "It's okay Ed. You're more adorable."

He froze, his face turning really red now. "Y-you mean that?"

I smiled. "Yeah! I mean.. you're just so short!"

His smile dropped and I could see a vein in his forehead popping out. "WHO ARE YOU CALLING SO SHORT HE COULD GET SQUASHED BY AN ANT?"

I laughed and walked to the door. I just shrugged. "Maybe I did mean it. Maybe I didn't."

Walking out of the room and closing the door, I could hear Ed shout back, "BUT YOU'RE SHORTER THAN ME!"

I just laughed and took a seat on the couch. Al and Jenna looked at me.

"What was that about?" Al asked. I just shook my head, and laid back on the couch smiling.

This was about to be a fun adventure.

**xXxXx**

**WOO! YET ANOTHER CHAPTER IS OUT! Thanks so much to those who reviewed/favorited/followed this story! It means a lot! And if you're reading this, and you haven't done any of those three, WELL GET ON IT! Please. Sadly, I will be away at bandcamp for the next week, so I will not be able to write! But I'll bring a journal and write the story down in my free time so when I come back I'll be ready to post again! Thanks for reading, and don't forget! REVIEW!**

**Al: Do it for the kitties!**

**Ed: Do it so I don't punch you all in the face.**

**Mustang: Do it because I'm sexy. That should be enough of a reason.**

**Ashley: Got that right. ;)**

**Jenna: BAD ASHLEY! BAD!**

**Ashley: Oh hush Jenna. A girl can dream. And dream I will. Hehehehehe.**

**Mustang: Ohhhkkaayyy. I'm gonna go now..**

**Ashley: I'LL COME WITH YOU! *clings to arm as Mustang runs out of the room***

**Jenna: Well… that was awkward… Don't forget to review!**


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